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	<title>Tunji Ishola</title>
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	<link>http://tunjiishola.com</link>
	<description>Empowering you for fullest living on God&#039;s terms</description>
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	<copyright>Copyright &#xA9; Tunji Ishola 2011 </copyright>
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	<itunes:summary>Consulting</itunes:summary>
	<itunes:keywords></itunes:keywords>
	<itunes:category text="Society &#38; Culture" />
	<itunes:author>Tunji Ishola</itunes:author>
	<itunes:owner>
		<itunes:name>Tunji Ishola</itunes:name>
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		<item>
		<title>How to write a winning CV</title>
		<link>http://tunjiishola.com/2012/04/30/how-to-write-a-winning-cv/</link>
		<comments>http://tunjiishola.com/2012/04/30/how-to-write-a-winning-cv/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 30 Apr 2012 20:26:56 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Tunji Ishola</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Better life]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Business]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Coaching]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Enterpreneur]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Communication]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Growth]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Personal Development]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Relationship]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://tunjiishola.com/?p=724</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[The main purpose of a good CV is to form a positive image of you in the minds of the prospective employer. To draft an effective and successful resume,you must consider mentioning the following points : 1. Highlight your best points: To make your CV have an edge over other applicants competing for the same [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://tunjiishola.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/jobs.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-725" title="jobs" src="http://tunjiishola.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/jobs.jpg" alt="" width="581" height="300" /></a>The main purpose of a good CV is to form a positive image of you in the minds of the prospective employer. To draft an effective and successful resume,you must consider mentioning the following points :</p>
<p>1. Highlight your best points:</p>
<p>To make your CV have an edge over other applicants competing for the same job you must highlight yourself in the Career Objective section and also highlight your Summary of your academic qualification. These sections of your CV must assert that you are the best choice for the job.</p>
<p>These sections should appear at the top of your resume. Your objective should be eye-catching and attract the employer to read and must convince the employer you are the perfect choice for the job opening.</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p>2. Prove Your Point:</p>
<p>Your Education, Certification, Achievements, Work Experience section must be cohesive of the earlier highlighted section of your CV. Make sure you present these sections in crisp and concise manner. Try to use action verbs and key words while listing the facts and details of your work experience.</p>
<p>These two sections are the most important that constitute an effective and successful CV. These points must be followed by detailed information about every section.</p>
<p>3. Mention an objective:</p>
<p>Your CV must have some kind of statement as an objective. Be specific when you write your objective.</p>
<p>For example,” Looking for a career in Information technology which can make use of my technical and customer service skills “is far better than just “looking for a career”</p>
<p>4. Experience:</p>
<p>Mention your degrees, certifications and any specialized training you have received. When mentioning experience also mention any internship you might have done.</p>
<p>5. Keep it Short:</p>
<p>You CV should not be more than two pages  unless you have worked at an executive level and have a long work history. A good CV should also provide some references that will be helpful for employers to cross check if he/she wants to.</p>
<p>6. Check spelling and grammar:</p>
<p>Proper grammar and no spelling errors is one of the important aspects of an effective resume. The basic fundamental thought behind this is majority of recruiting managers will have a negative impression about you, if you commit such errors in your CV. It gives an impression that you are irresponsible person who doesn’t even bother to go through your CV and rectify mistakes.</p>
<p>Now, that you have learned the different aspects about an effective CV. The CV template given below will give you a clear idea on where to place details about yourself, educational details and experience in a CV to make it look professional and impress the employer.</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<title>Bust A New Move Today</title>
		<link>http://tunjiishola.com/2012/03/25/bust-a-new-move-today/</link>
		<comments>http://tunjiishola.com/2012/03/25/bust-a-new-move-today/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 25 Mar 2012 13:45:41 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Tunji Ishola</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Better life]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Faith]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Inspiration]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Motivation]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Relationship]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Spirituality]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Vision]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Challenges]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Contribution]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Inspirations]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Personal Development]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Purpose]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://tunjiishola.com/?p=716</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Blessed is the one who does not walk in step with the wicked or stand in the way that sinners take or sit in the company of mockers, but whose delight is in the law of the LORD, and who meditates on his law day and night. That person is like a tree planted by [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><strong><a href="http://tunjiishola.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/over-challenges.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-717" title="over challenges" src="http://tunjiishola.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/over-challenges.jpg" alt="" width="581" height="338" /></a>Blessed is the one who does not walk in step with the wicked or stand in the way that sinners take or sit in the company of mockers, but whose delight is in the law of the LORD, and who meditates on his law day and night. That person is like a tree planted by streams of water, which yields its fruit in season and whose leaf does not wither and whatever they do prospers”. (Psalm 1:1-3).</strong></p>
<p>You will be a happy person if you don’t listen to wrong influences, hang around corrupt people, or become negative or cynical. Whatever image stays in your mind becomes real in time. You never put anything or anybody in front of you that you don’t want in your life. You become what you behold.</p>
<p>You are not only known by the company you keep, you are also known by the company you shun. When you run with the crowd, you get no further than the crowd.</p>
<p>If you are on an assignment, don&#8217;t let no one stop you, ask them to walk with you.</p>
<p>1. A wise person values biblical truth and thinks on it before acting.</p>
<p>2. A wise person does not just meditate/think night and day; he/she also is a person of ACTION.</p>
<p>3. A wise person establishes himself in a NURTURING and  NOURISHING environment.</p>
<p>Most times we say we are waiting on God; when God is waiting on us. You show what you are waiting on by demonstrating what you are working on. God will only prosper what you are willing to do.</p>
<p>Waiting: labouring faithfully and joyously on the assignment God has already given you and doing what you know to do until he has given or released your next assignment.</p>
<p>Personal responsibility is about each of us holding ourselves accountable for our own thinking and behaviours and the results they produce! If it&#8217;s going to be, it&#8217;s up to you by taking responsibility for yourself and  for your own Actions!</p>
<p>You can only be in control of yourself and your own actions and decisions&#8230;..and then bust a new move. You can&#8217;t change your life until you take responsibility.</p>
<p>You don&#8217;t get what you pray for only but also get what you sow for!</p>
<p>You don&#8217;t grow unless you move. You can always correct or improve doing &#8220;Something&#8221; but you cannot correct doing &#8220;Nothing&#8221;! When you leave things to themselves they don&#8217;t just work themselves out, they will get worse.</p>
<p>Inaction brings stagnation and discouragement. Action leads us towards solution; inaction holds us in the past; Action demonstrates courage; inaction indicates fear.</p>
<p>Below are some of the  steps that will help you to burst a new move:</p>
<p>• Pray regularly</p>
<p>• Research</p>
<p>• Get counsel</p>
<p>• Decide what to do&#8230;..Make a Plan</p>
<p>• Set goals (goals that are specific, measurable, attainable, time sensitive SMART);</p>
<p>• Take Action (Bust a move).</p>
<p>Always remember, that you are the centre of the universe and with God you can do the IMPOSSIBLE and achieve the UNIMAGINABLE!!!</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<title>Overcome Your Need to Be a People Pleaser (2)</title>
		<link>http://tunjiishola.com/2012/03/05/overcome-your-need-to-be-a-people-pleaser-2/</link>
		<comments>http://tunjiishola.com/2012/03/05/overcome-your-need-to-be-a-people-pleaser-2/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 05 Mar 2012 06:14:24 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Tunji Ishola</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Better life]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Business]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Career]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Faith]]></category>
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		<category><![CDATA[Motivation]]></category>
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		<category><![CDATA[Spirituality]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Vision]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Adversity]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Emotion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Growth]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Happiness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Identity]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Inspirations]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Personal Development]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://tunjiishola.com/?p=707</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[&#8220;Obviously, I&#8217;m not trying to win the approval of people, but of God. If pleasing people were my goal, I would not be Christ&#8217;s servant&#8221;. (Galatians 1:10) TLB. 3. Get on the buddy system. Once you’ve identified the people who abuse your desperate need to please everyone at every interval throughout the day and your [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><strong><a href="http://tunjiishola.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/break_chains1.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-710" title="break_chains1" src="http://tunjiishola.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/break_chains1.jpg" alt="" width="590" height="334" /></a>&#8220;Obviously, I&#8217;m not trying to win the approval of people, but of God. If pleasing people were my goal, I would not be Christ&#8217;s servant&#8221;. (Galatians 1:10) TLB.</strong></p>
<p><strong>3. Get on the buddy system.</strong> Once you’ve identified the people who abuse your desperate need to please everyone at every interval throughout the day and your life, you’ll also be able to identify the people who will be a buddy through your rough times.</p>
<p>The buddy system has been proven successful in weight loss— according to Weight Watchers women especially who diet and exercise with a buddy almost always lose more weight and stick with the program longer than those who don’t have a buddy, and the same principal applies with getting over your need for approval. But why does the buddy system work so well?</p>
<p>For one, you get the approval you need from another person without damaging yourself and you also get the constructive support you need when you’re not meeting your goals—encouragement, opinions, ideas, etc.</p>
<p>But simply changing your current behaviours or confronting the culprits won’t be enough to help you avoid a repeat of history in your near future. You need to understand why you exhibit the “need to please” behaviours in the first place in order to learn how to deal with them. So how can you figure out why you do what you do? Of course, you can always go to a therapist. But before you shell out hundreds of dollars per session to talk your problems out with a pro, you should try a few simple techniques to see if you can help yourself. The word of God works in all situations.</p>
<p><strong>4. Think about your past.</strong> Not just your immediate past, but the last 20 years and even further back. Your need to please probably exists as far back as you can remember, even into your childhood days. In “The Disease to Please,” Dr. Braikman explains that “the difficulty may start innocently enough with genuine and generous attempts to make others happy.” Chances are, if you are a people-pleasing addict, you have been for as long as you can remember and maybe longer.</p>
<p><strong>5. Strengthen your mindset.</strong> Strengthening your mindset may seem like a simple enough task. In fact, you’re probably thinking, “What does this have to do with getting over my need to please others?” or “How will this advice help me to get over my need to please others?” In fact, one of the clearest reasons for being the “yes man” is a self esteem issue and you have to start feeling stronger and being stronger, both emotionally and mentally before you can overcome your issues.</p>
<p><strong> 6. Learn to disappoint honestly</strong>. Strange as it may seem, one of the greatest things you can do for your career, your personal life and your disease to please is to learn to disappoint once in a while. SUCH AND SUCH an AUTHOR of “Nice Girls Don’t Get the Corner Office” claims that you should learn to waste a little time around the office.</p>
<p>Susan Newman takes it a step further in “The Book of No” by writing that you should “avoid tasks that are beyond your abilities or expertise”—while this may seem brash for those trying to get ahead, don’t forget that when you stretch your abilities, you may get new responsibilities but you won’t be leaving your other responsibilities behind…and you’ll be setting yourself up to being forced, guilted or harassed into doing work you may know little about (an even bigger stress!) or just plain don’t have time for.</p>
<p>If learning to look in the mirror and tell yourself No seems impossible to you, then you may feel as if you will never break free of the tragic cycle of people-pleasing you have created for yourself. But, according to Dr. Braiker in “The Disease to Please” the people-pleasing addiction is just that—an addiction. Braiker notes that the disease to please is wrapped around “underlying approval addiction, toxic mindsets that rationalise and perpetuate the problem, and the fear and avoidance of anger, rejection and confrontation that fuel the emotional avoidance pattern.” And just like a drug, you have to rehab yourself, your emotions, your mental state and your physical well-being by learning to live without your drug of choice.</p>
<p>Hitting rock bottom will be a part of the long road to recovery from being a yes-man to a member of the free state of being that so many others enjoy.</p>
<p>And if that alone is not enough to entice you, just think back on your last free night alone at home—can you remember? If not, then it’s time to think about a future filled with moments to breathe, time to read a book and the ability to walk away from someone else’s problem unscathed and without a hand in the solution—it’s time to start taking care of yourself</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<title>Overcome Your Need to Be a People Pleaser (1)</title>
		<link>http://tunjiishola.com/2012/02/25/overcome-your-need-to-be-a-people-pleaser-1/</link>
		<comments>http://tunjiishola.com/2012/02/25/overcome-your-need-to-be-a-people-pleaser-1/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 25 Feb 2012 12:03:05 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Tunji Ishola</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Better life]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Business]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Career]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Enterpreneur]]></category>
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		<category><![CDATA[Vision]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Challenges]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Communication]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Emotion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[God]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Growth]]></category>
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		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://tunjiishola.com/?p=699</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[&#8220;Obviously, I&#8217;m not trying to win the approval of people, but of God. If pleasing people were my goal, I would not be Christ&#8217;s servant&#8221;. (Galatians 1:10) TLB. Approval is a wonderful and terrible thing. When you achieve, receive and truly earn it, you are on top of the world. When you don’t, you can [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><strong><a href="http://tunjiishola.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/people_pleaser.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-701" title="people_pleaser" src="http://tunjiishola.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/people_pleaser.jpg" alt="" width="589" height="325" /></a>&#8220;Obviously, I&#8217;m not trying to win the approval of people, but of God. If pleasing people were my goal, I would not be Christ&#8217;s servant&#8221;. (Galatians 1:10) TLB.</strong></p>
<p>Approval is a wonderful and terrible thing. When you achieve, receive and truly earn it, you are on top of the world. When you don’t, you can be down in the dumps or you can learn to do better next time.</p>
<p>Pleasing others is a natural instinct that isn’t all bad, though. David Fontana, author of “Managing Stress,” says that “Wanting to please others is a desirable trait. It shows we’re concerned for the welfare of those around us and not too bound up.” And while Fontana makes an excellent point, there is a point at which the need to please become a disease that’s just as addictive as the next hardcore drug.</p>
<p>Sure, taking care of others and not wishing to see those you care about disappointed is a human trait. But what if you can’t accept disappointment for yourself or for anyone else?</p>
<p>Dr. Harriet Braiker, PhD and author of “The Disease to Please: Curing the People-Pleasing Syndrome” <span style="text-decoration: underline;">writes that “those who suffer from the Disease to Please are people who say ‘yes’ when they really want to say ‘no’—but they can’t.”</span></p>
<p>If you are the constant “yes man”—working late, coming in early, pushing weekends, chairing every committee, washing your neighbour’s car and your mother’s dog—then you have a problem.</p>
<p>You have the disease to please if you hate to disappoint, let down, inconvenience or in any way lose the supposed approval of everyone or yourself, and it’s high time you took the low road out and you should do it in a hurry.</p>
<p>But how? It’s pretty simple and I will show you how I overcame this horrible disease and be your best for God and humanity.</p>
<p><strong> 1. Identify the behaviour to modify the behaviour</strong>. First things first. You should know by now that you can’t solve a problem until you know what the problem is. You need to sit down and make a true effort to list out the situations, words, phrases, people, places and actions that cause you to become a “yes man,” figure out why and then work to resolve your issues, one at a time. Howard D. Fradkin, PhD and author of “Affirming Your Mental Health: Managing Your Holiday Stress,” writes that “needing to please others is another aspect of the pressure we can put on ourselves, especially around gift giving.”</p>
<p>Take a moment to think about the situations in your past, especially around holidays and birthdays, that have caused you stress and you’ve gone above and beyond the call of duty to avoid causing disappointment, only to raise the bar on yourself time and time again. Fradkin points to the need to “seem generous enough” or “whether the recipient will like the gift.”</p>
<p>This is a prime example of how your disease to please puts you in a crunch…not just mentally and emotionally but also financially—just how much is enough to make you seem generous enough anyway??</p>
<p><strong> 2. Identify and confront the culprits</strong>. If you are a yes man, chances are you could make a list of the people who constantly ask you for “favours”—otherwise known as dumping their responsibilities onto your shoulders because they know you won’t say no. And you should. Make a list, that is.</p>
<p>Susan Newman, author of “The Book of No” writes that you should “exercise your power and choice to say no, repeat no until you are heard and use no to get your life in control and to be in control of it.” Newman also points out that you should weight the fallout of saying no and always ask for full details before committing to anything.</p>
<p>But don’t forget that there are always those people in your life who try to con you or cajole you into saying yes…these are the people you should practice saying No to and make sure you make it stick.</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<title>Learn To Hit Delete Button and Let Go (2)</title>
		<link>http://tunjiishola.com/2012/02/19/learn-to-hit-delete-button-and-let-go-2/</link>
		<comments>http://tunjiishola.com/2012/02/19/learn-to-hit-delete-button-and-let-go-2/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 19 Feb 2012 09:38:26 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Tunji Ishola</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Better life]]></category>
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		<category><![CDATA[Motivation]]></category>
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		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://tunjiishola.com/?p=691</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[&#8220;Human anger does not produce the righteousness God desires&#8221;. James 1:20. NLT. 3. Realise that it’s about restoring your connection to the outside world, the real world. In her book, “The Magic of Forgiveness: Emotional Freedom and Transformation at Midlife, A Book for Women,” Tian Dayton, PhD, writes that, “Forgiveness, on all levels, whether you’re [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><strong><a href="http://tunjiishola.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/FORGIVESS2.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-694" title="FORGIVESS2" src="http://tunjiishola.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/FORGIVESS2.jpg" alt="" width="585" height="310" /></a></strong></p>
<p><strong>&#8220;Human anger does not produce the righteousness God desires&#8221;. James 1:20. NLT.</strong></p>
<p><strong>3.</strong> <strong>Realise that it’s about restoring your connection to the outside world, the real world.</strong> In her book, “The Magic of Forgiveness: Emotional Freedom and Transformation at Midlife, A Book for Women,” Tian Dayton, PhD, writes that, “Forgiveness, on all levels, whether you’re forgiving the person who nudged ahead of you in the grocery line or your mother for ignoring you as a child, is relational in nature; it is about either restoring a relationship connection in the real world or restoring the connection that lives inside the self. Relationships are core to the world in which we all operate.” Dayton’s studies, including the observations of her own relationships, point to a realisation that forgiveness is akin to isolation.</p>
<p>By allowing yourself to forgive offenses, you are allowing yourself to move on and be free from the binding chains of hatred and self-loathing—that’s right…don’t forget that carrying a heavy burden like the need to forgive eventually wears you down just like any other emotional and mental burden.</p>
<p><strong>4. Think of it as a completely free stress-relief drug.</strong> Simply thinking about forgiveness when a stressful, pained memory comes up is enough to reduce the stress response in incredible numbers. Forgiveness (or just the thought of forgiveness) has the potential to offer the following life benefits:</p>
<p>• Decrease in anger and negative thoughts</p>
<p>• Decrease in anxiety</p>
<p>• Decrease in depression and grief</p>
<p>• Decrease in vulnerability to substance abuse</p>
<p>Imagine what your life would be like without an exorbitant amount of anger, negativity, anxiety, depression and grief? You would be a whole new person. This study not only implies the ability to change your life but helps you to understand that thinking peaceful thoughts—so, that vision of wringing your co-worker’s neck tomorrow should be the first thing to go—helps to change your overall outlook on life, your demeanour and your well being.</p>
<p>Every day, we are trying to become better, stronger and faster than everyone else, just to ensure that we survive, whatever the struggle may be—a new job, a slouching economy, a family battle, a new business idea or just the daily struggle to get out of bed and get the family ready for the day. Too often, as it may be, we end up butting heads with someone we love, someone we like or someone we just weren’t sure about—and then there’s no getting back to where we started from. They offended you and you offended them. There’s no getting around it.</p>
<p>But there is a way of dealing with it. And recognising these amazing benefits—mental, physical and emotional—of offering forgiveness to those around you, is the only way to ensure that you stay on top of your game and ahead of the pack in everything that you do.</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
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		<title>Learn To Hit Delete Button and Let Go (1)</title>
		<link>http://tunjiishola.com/2012/02/18/learn-to-hit-delete-button-and-let-go-1/</link>
		<comments>http://tunjiishola.com/2012/02/18/learn-to-hit-delete-button-and-let-go-1/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 18 Feb 2012 06:04:39 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Tunji Ishola</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Better life]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Faith]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Inspiration]]></category>
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		<category><![CDATA[Emotion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[God]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Growth]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Happiness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Inspirations]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Learning]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Life]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Personal Development]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[&#8220;For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you&#8221;. (Mattew 6:14). Forgiveness. It’s the most precious gift we can give as human beings and also the most difficult to give. As often as we hold grudges and keep from offering this amazing gift, we often have no [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><strong><a href="http://tunjiishola.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/forgiveness.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-686" title="Woman Receiving Flowers" src="http://tunjiishola.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/forgiveness.jpg" alt="" width="582" height="311" /></a>&#8220;For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you&#8221;. (Mattew 6:14).</strong></p>
<p>Forgiveness. It’s the most precious gift we can give as human beings and also the most difficult to give. As often as we hold grudges and keep from offering this amazing gift, we often have no idea of the emotionally, mental and physical benefits we are keeping from ourselves. In reality, offering forgiveness is as beneficial to the giver as it is to the receiver. And don’t forget that true forgiveness—remember, you can say you’re sorry without really meaning it and the same is true of offering forgiveness!—will help your relationships blossom, grow and endure, whether these relationships exist with your significant other or spouse, family, friends or co-workers.</p>
<p>Still don’t believe that forgiveness is the key to your happiness in life at home and at work? Take a look at some hard evidence that true forgiveness makes everything better:</p>
<p>1. <strong>Learning the difference between personal offense and offenses unrelated to you.</strong> Many people who have a difficult time forgiving offenses, no matter how great or how small, is that they don’t seem to understand that most offensive remarks or painful events have nothing to do with them at all. You should be paying attention now especially if you find that you get angry or upset when someone other yourself suffers an offense and you are unwilling to forgive the offender. In his book, “Forgive for Good,” author Frederic Luskin relates a study he performed with a woman named Marilyn, whose parents were uncaring, unkind and abusive.</p>
<p>“As a child, Marilyn legitimately took her mother’s lack of care personally. Unfortunately, she continues to do so as an adult.” It’s important to understand that while a parent is responsible to care for a child, you should learn to forgive those in your life (or others’ lives) who commit the same offense to you or others.</p>
<p>Luskin goes on to say that it is important to understand the difference between personal offense and unrelated offense, as well as to forgive and forget. “The challenge is to locate the impersonal part of the hurt the rejections, mistreatments and insults happen to us…we cannot feel the impact of each of these tragedies personally. We have to care more about some than others.</p>
<p>The fact that we ignore, or care less about, some tragedies reflect our understanding that we cannot possibly deal with all the suffering in the world. We know that impersonal hurt is everywhere.” Luskin makes a point that everyone should strive to understand—we cannot take on the burden of all the pain the world and we should not try to carry the burden of unforgiveness with us for every little offense, whether it is directed at us or not. This not only allows us to walk burden free, but also frees up the path of destruction for a path of enlightenment and freedom.</p>
<p><strong>2.</strong> <strong>Learning to feel like we are “in it together.”</strong> In Luskin’s study with Marilyn, he points out the immediate challenge of learning to forgive—we all feel so alone. Luskin writes, “The challenge is to locate the impersonal part of the hurt when the rejections, mistreatments and insults happen to us.</p>
<p>Instead of felling alone in our suffering, we might remember how [it] happen[s] to many other people as well, which means that our mistreatment was not only personal.” When you learn to recognise that others, even the offender in your life, have most likely experienced the same offenses and pains that you have experienced, it will be easier for you to forgive. The benefit here lies in the fact that you will learn to appreciate the experiences of others and perhaps not be so hasty in your anger in the future.</p>
<p>To be continued &#8230;&#8230;</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
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		<title>Go and Get Your Best Job !</title>
		<link>http://tunjiishola.com/2012/02/07/go-and-get-your-best-job/</link>
		<comments>http://tunjiishola.com/2012/02/07/go-and-get-your-best-job/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 07 Feb 2012 22:15:49 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Tunji Ishola</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Better life]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Business]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Career]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Coaching]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Vision]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Adversity]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Challenges]]></category>
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		<description><![CDATA[&#8221; Work brings profit, but mere talk leads poverty&#8221;. Proverbs 23:14. At certain time in life, everyone thinks about what is the best job to do. Many independent studies, websites and books tell us about the best job, according to a wide range of characteristics- from the economic conditions at present and the outlook of [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><strong><a href="http://tunjiishola.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/job-seeking.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-680" title="job-seeking" src="http://tunjiishola.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/job-seeking.jpg" alt="" width="601" height="315" /></a>&#8221; Work brings profit, but mere talk leads poverty&#8221;. Proverbs 23:14.</strong></p>
<p>At certain time in life, everyone thinks about what is the best job to do. Many independent studies, websites and books tell us about the best job, according to a wide range of characteristics- from the economic conditions at present and the outlook of growth, to the physical and mental stress involved and the working environment of these jobs. However, the truth is that the best job depends upon each individual and his or her personality.</p>
<p>The personality of any one person in the world is shaped by a myriad of phenomenon and factors. The time and place of birth, the upbringing of the person and what is taught by the parents are vital to molding a personality.</p>
<p>Similarly, the schools attended and any bad or good incidents that happen during their lifetime also determine the personalities of people. Because of this, the personality of a person is distinct from any other person in the world.<strong><span style="text-decoration: underline;"> The best job for a person is the one that, in the long run, gives him or her most happiness</span></strong>. For each person this happiness can have different definition, and a job that satisfies one person may not necessarily satisfy others. This is why the best job is different for each person and is dependant on the likes and dislikes of an individual.</p>
<p>To find out what exactly the best job is for you, firstly, you need to ask yourself, what do you do that brings most joy to you? It can be a hobby like singing, playing a sport or painting, or it can be even be simple things, such as talking to people. If you are in job that you like doing, then that is the biggest contributor to making it the best job. <strong><span style="text-decoration: underline;">Next, you need to see the viability of this job, if it can give enough money and will you be able to reach a better stage in life with this job.</span></strong></p>
<p>Lastly, have a strong belief that nothing is impossible and step out and do what you love to do by faith guided with a written goal.</p>
<p>There are a lot of other things to be considered when you are looking for the best job. There is no exact best job; a job is made the best by you.</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
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		<title>Do You Have The FIRE To Go FAR?</title>
		<link>http://tunjiishola.com/2012/01/28/do-you-have-the-fire-to-go-far/</link>
		<comments>http://tunjiishola.com/2012/01/28/do-you-have-the-fire-to-go-far/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 28 Jan 2012 11:36:13 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Tunji Ishola</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Better life]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Business]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Career]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Enterpreneur]]></category>
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		<category><![CDATA[Motivation]]></category>
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		<category><![CDATA[Challenges]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[focus]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Passion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Personal Development]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Purpose]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://tunjiishola.com/?p=665</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[A young violin prodigy was walking down the street one day trying to decide whether or not to pursue a life in music when he came upon the most famous violin teacher in the world. Scarcely believing his luck, he stopped the great teacher and asked if he could play for him, thinking he would [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://tunjiishola.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/passion1.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-667" title="passion" src="http://tunjiishola.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/passion1.jpg" alt="" width="600" height="307" /></a>A young violin prodigy was walking down the street one day trying to decide whether or not to pursue a life in music when he came upon the most famous violin teacher in the world. Scarcely believing his luck, he stopped the great teacher and asked if he could play for him, thinking he would abandon his dream of a career in music if the great teacher told him he was wasting his time.</p>
<p>The greater teacher nodded silently for him to begin. So he played, beads of sweat soon appearing on his forehead, and when he finished, he was certain he’d given his finest performance. But the great maestro only shook his head sadly and said, <strong>“You lack the fire.”</strong></p>
<p>The young musician was devastated. Nevertheless, he returned home and announced his intention to abandon the violin. Instead, he entered the world of business and turned out to have such a talent for it that in a few short years he found himself richer than he’d ever imagined possible.</p>
<p>Almost a decade later he found himself walking down another street in another city when he happened to spot the great teacher again. He rushed over to him. “I’m so sorry to bother you,” he said, “and I’m sure you don’t remember me, but I stopped you on the street years ago to play my violin for you, and I just want to thank you. Because of your advice, I abandoned my greatest love, the violin, painful as it was, and became a businessman and today enjoy great success, which I owe all to you. But one thing you must tell me: how did you know I didn’t have what it takes? How did you know all those years ago I lacked the fire?”</p>
<p>The great teacher shook his head sadly and said only, “You don’t understand. I tell everyone who plays for me they lack the fire. If you had the fire, you wouldn’t have listened.”</p>
<p><strong>Without passion man is a mere latent force and possibility, like the flint which awaits the shock of the iron before it can give forth its spark.”</strong></p>
<p>Henri-Frédéric Amiel</p>
<p>Passion is most evident when the mind, body and spirit work together to create, develop and articulate or make manifest our feelings, ideas and most sacred values.</p>
<p><span style="text-decoration: underline;">Passion enables us to overcome obstacles (both real and imagined) and to see the world as a place of infinite potential. The passionate spirit looks at every occurrence and discovers the golden kernels of what can be, what should be and what will be</span>.</p>
<p>Passion is a gift of the spirit combined with the totality of all the experiences we&#8217;ve lived through. It endows each of us with the power to live and communicate with unbridled enthusiasm.</p>
<ul>
<li>Passion gives motion to mission.</li>
<li>Passion shows the pain you are willing to enjoy for your purpose.</li>
<li>Passion helps to know what is worth dieing for.</li>
<li>Passion shows what you are willing to walk away from.</li>
<li>Passion is that fire that brings attraction to life.</li>
</ul>
<p><strong>Passion was unveiled when :</strong></p>
<p>• Jeremiah- Word like fire in the soul. Jer 20:9</p>
<p>• David- Ran towards Goliath. I Sam 17:48</p>
<p>• Jesus – Do the work of him that sent me day and night. John 9:4</p>
<p>• Paul – Ready to be poured out like a drink. 2 Tim 4:6</p>
<p>• Timothy- Give yourself wholly. 1 Tim 4:15</p>
<p><strong>Passion Resulted to:</strong></p>
<p>• Passion shapes our existence</p>
<p>• Distinguishes from peers</p>
<p>• Fuels the fires of inspiration</p>
<p>• Makes the heart and mind open to changes all around us.</p>
<p>• Sparks that illuminate  our purpose and mission for being here.</p>
<p>• The power of passion forces us to see others as who they are, who they are becoming and often, who they can never be.</p>
<p>In all you do, never lack the fire because it is what brings attraction and meaning to purpose.</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
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		<title>Improving Your Health For Significance (2)</title>
		<link>http://tunjiishola.com/2012/01/26/improving-your-health-for-significance-2/</link>
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		<pubDate>Thu, 26 Jan 2012 10:47:05 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Tunji Ishola</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Better life]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Faith]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Health]]></category>
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		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://tunjiishola.com/?p=657</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[&#8220;A cheerful heart is a good medicine but a crushed spirit dries up the bones&#8221;. (Proverbs 17:22). By laughing,  people are broadcasting health at a higher frequency. They don’t have room for dark or negative thoughts when laughing and thus are encouraging creative thoughts aimed at the health of their bodies. What is it we’re [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><strong><a href="http://tunjiishola.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/laughter.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-659" title="laughter" src="http://tunjiishola.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/laughter.jpg" alt="" width="607" height="327" /></a>&#8220;A cheerful heart is a good medicine but a crushed spirit dries up the bones&#8221;. (Proverbs 17:22).</strong></p>
<p>By laughing,  people are broadcasting health at a higher frequency. They don’t have room for dark or negative thoughts when laughing and thus are encouraging creative thoughts aimed at the health of their bodies.</p>
<p>What is it we’re told is one of the major causes of illness these days? Stress. And stress originates out of negative thinking. One small negative thought cast out to be reflected back to you can cause serious ramifications.</p>
<p>At the same time, one small positive thought can change that. One thought, then another. Affirmative, constructive thought, <strong><span style="text-decoration: underline;">focusing always on what you want and rather than what you don’t want.</span></strong></p>
<p>That applies to your health as much as it does to any other aspect of your life. If you’ve had chronic health problems you may well ask yourself, &#8220;What other problem is there? What am I doing that I’ve been unaware of to reinforce this situation?&#8221; Work to uncover what the basis for the problem is. Many times, once you discover it, you understand right away where the beginning point of the illness is and can then turn your thoughts to correcting the matter.</p>
<p>Once you discover the core you can work on the illness itself. If this has been a chronic situation, drawn out over many years, it is understandable that it has been held in the body by continual thought and observation of the illness. The worse it gets, the more you focus on it, and through the law of attraction, attract more of the same.</p>
<p><span style="text-decoration: underline;"><strong>It’s time to redirect your thoughts. Start practising your faith in God&#8217;s positive thoughts. If the illness involves pain, use your medication to help eliminate that pain and allow you to focus more clearly</strong></span>. You can then bring your thoughts to your own perfect health. To how you feel when you’re in perfect health, the things you do and enjoy. Believe that perfect health you envision.</p>
<p>Anyone can do this and use it to work harmoniously with the medical attention being received. Opening oneself to the wonder and abundance of the universe by expecting all the good things it offers and turning away from the negative thoughts that cut you off will result in a drop of those little aches and pains that plague you and you will cease believing every day is painful to get through.</p>
<p>Cultivate confident, upbeat thinking and no matter what may have transpired in the past, you will change it. Set goals, develop a plan and resolve to accomplish something each day – whether large or small.</p>
<p>Eliminate stress from your life. Change your thinking about the everyday things that bother you. Recognise them for what they are and set them aside. Don’t continually run a tape over and over in your mind about office disputes, traffic mishaps or the bad chilli you had for lunch. Set it aside and understand with joy, humour and conviction coupled with any medical assistance you may need to help you through—you really can heal yourself.</p>
<p>There are many instances of people actually using laughter to help in their recovery. Watching funny movies, listening to CDs, enjoying the happy memories with friends and just laughing and laughing. Laughter sheds negativity and with it, a person will release disease.</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
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		<title>Improving Your Health For Significance (1)</title>
		<link>http://tunjiishola.com/2012/01/24/improving-your-health-for-significance-1/</link>
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		<pubDate>Tue, 24 Jan 2012 11:09:07 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Tunji Ishola</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Better life]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Business]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Faith]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Health]]></category>
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		<description><![CDATA[&#8220;Dear friend, I pray that you may enjoy good health and that all may go well with you, even as your soul is getting along well&#8221;. (3 John 1:2). Some people think good health is  something we’re all simply born with. A propensity toward good health or bad health. We’re born with the inclination of fat [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><strong><a href="http://tunjiishola.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/health-1.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-653" title="health 1" src="http://tunjiishola.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/health-1.jpg" alt="" width="594" height="312" /></a>&#8220;Dear friend, I pray that you may enjoy good health and that all may go well with you, even as your soul is getting along well&#8221;. (3 John 1:2).</strong></p>
<p>Some people think good health is  something we’re all simply born with. A propensity toward good health or bad health. We’re born with the inclination of fat or thin. What we are, is what we are, and what we have is what we have, end of story.</p>
<p>No, not the end of the story, in fact, it’s just the beginning. The magnetic abilities of our thoughts do not stop with ‘things’. We can all focus our thoughts on optimal health no matter what is going on outside.</p>
<p>Dr. John Demartini is a Human Behavorial Specialist, educator and author who’s dedicated his life to the understanding of universal laws. He got his Bachelors of Science degree from the University of Houston, then studied Chiropractic at the Texas Chiropractic College graduating magna Cum Laude and went on finally to found the Demartini Institute in Houston which is dedicated to exploring and expanding human awareness and potential. Dr. Demartini has known about the law of attraction and the way the universe reflects back on you what you think and expect. He’s broken free of wearing braces as a child, overcome dyslexia, and become a great proponent of opening the heart and mind to a new paradigm of life that he is today.</p>
<p>Dr. Demartini advises: &#8220;If a person is sick and has an alternative to explore what is in their mind creating it, versus using medicines, if it’s an acute situation that could really bring death to them, then obviously the medicine is the wise thing to do, while they explore what the mind is about. So you don’t want to negate medicine. Every form of healing has its place.&#8221;</p>
<p>So, plainly, any thinking person is going to wisely choose to combine the benefits of what his or her doctor recommends and the power of what your willpower can truly do.</p>
<p><strong><span style="text-decoration: underline;">Think about it. Have you ever experienced the ’placebo effect’? Know anyone who was terribly ill, or just had a problem, then took a pill, like a sugar pill, or did something that should have had no true effect on the body, yet that person suddenly simply just got better</span></strong>?</p>
<p>The placebo effect is one area where the power of the mind is centre stage. Why would a person get better because someone told them to take a certain pill and it would help them, cure them, but was it only really a sugar pill? Quite simply, <strong><span style="text-decoration: underline;">when a person truly believes the pill he or she is given is a cure, then what is expected will be received and thus, a cure. It isn’t the pill that cures them, it is their belief that they will be cured.</span></strong> The thoughts that they send out into the universe expecting a cure. Immediately, the universe responds by manifesting just that in their lives. In that instance, all the clarifying, and even some of the focus, was already done for the person.</p>
<p>The Doctor gave him a pill and told him it would do the job. The patient had faith in the Doctor and wanted to believe that pill would cure him in any case. The thoughts he sent out into the universe were clear, focused, and expectant. What that patient got back was exactly as he expected. A cure for his problem.</p>
<p>For most of us, it’s difficult to not listen to society’s messages about diseases and aging. Negative messages are what drive the commercial health care system and those negative messages are exactly what people do not need to tune into. We would be well advised to mute the TV when the ads for the ‘pill of the week’ come on and tell you that you probably need it and should see your doctor to discuss it soon. If you don’t, what terrible thing may ensue?</p>
<p>Focusing on illness, the possibility of it, the little ache or pain that might be indicative of something major are all thoughts that will draw more of the same to you.</p>
<p>That’s not to say you should not have a check-up or see a physician when there is the need. As Dr. Demartini pointed out earlier, every form of healing has its place and it’s wise to utilize the help we have at hand while exploring what the mind can really do. Just because the law of attraction exists doesn’t mean every individual has learned how to properly use and channel its power.</p>
<p>So begin now, think about optimum health. And while thinking about optimum health, think about what Dr. John Hagelin, Quantum Physicist, author of many scientific papers and Director of the Institute of Science at Maharisi University of Management said<strong><span style="text-decoration: underline;">: &#8220;Our body really is the product of our thoughts. We’re beginning to understand in medical science the degree to which the nature of thoughts and emotions actually determines the physical substance and structure and function of our bodies.&#8221;</span></strong></p>
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<p>That takes a bit of considering and some getting used to. And it comes from a Quantum Physicist. What you think, the attitude you have toward your life, is creating the very body you reside in. To focus your thoughts on perfect health then is to begin creating what you want your body to be. We can all do it and we can do it anytime and anywhere.</p>
<p>Take a few minutes from your lunch break to visualise yourself in perfect health, enjoying doing what you love. Last thing when you go to sleep, believe you are strong and healthy. Don’t participate in lengthy discussions with co-workers about their constant and chronic illnesses. Perhaps add a positive comment, then change the subject and give some thought to seeing those people in the best of health.</p>
<p>When you think about disease, give it attention, observe it, and you will generate more of it. Listening to others go on at length only adds energy to their problem. And, if you’re feeling a bit under the weather, don’t talk about it yourself, think about it endlessly and thereby keeping other, more positive and energising thoughts from your mind.</p>
<p>Instead, focus on your own good health, how you feel when whatever it is that is currently bothering you isn’t.</p>
<p>If it is more than minor, take action as you would do in any endeavour you begin and expect a good outcome for. See a doctor, explain the situation, get what you need from him or her, then direct your thoughts away from the negative – the problem itself – and back to yourself at perfect health.</p>
<p>Really feel what it means to you to be in good health, to draw breath deeply into your lungs, to revel in the sunshine, every part of you feeling glorious. Expect that feeling to be your normal state.</p>
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